Oatie: I think Oatie was a guy in a band called "Oatie and the Goats," it wasn't really something I knew about, it was more my friend Mia's thing. Oatie quickly became the name of a deity who routinely possessed us when we did something cool or stupid. [BACK]

Full Frontal Nudity: It's a thing from Monty Python's Flying Circus. [BACK]

Must stop . . . shpyder!: It's a They Might Be Giants song lyric that I found amusing. [BACK]

Reefer: This is a quote from something, either Kids in the Hall or The State; Mia said it at some point and I found it funny, so I wrote it down. [BACK]

Ho-dee-doe: "Hold the door," from some stupid joke . . . also something Bruce the Duck said in a story I wrote. [BACK]

Ween: Ween was my favorite band, and at the time it was Mia's favorite band too. The pursuit of their music is a civil right. [BACK]

Mango Woman: "Mango Woman . . . oh, ya . . . " Part of a Ween song we got on some sort of single or import . . . very funny song. [BACK]

This shit will get you really really high!: Quote from the Ween song "Smoke some grass." We thought it was hilarious. [BACK]

Magneto: He's a somewhat bad X-Men character, and the end guy in the X-Men video game we spent much time and money trying to beat. [BACK]

Juggernaut: Another X-Men character in the game, the next-to-last guy. He was hard to beat and very frustrating to play against. [BACK]

Bruce Day: We had made-up holidays. We created one on the 28th of every month called "Bruce Day" in honor of Bruce the Duck, a character in my very silly short story. [BACK]

Talk to me, you silly little freak!: Direct quote from one of the Jerky Boys albums. Quite amusing. [BACK]

Pumpin' for the man: The title of a Ween song, of course. Very funny song about how much it sucks to work at a gas station. [BACK]

Tank Girl: Comic book character and star of a movie by the same name. She was quite cool and captured my attention. [BACK]

Slapping Trespassers: I think this was on a sign in the comic or in the movie of Tank Girl. "Trespassers will be slapped!" [BACK]

Lori Petty: She played Tank Girl in the movie and was thus my idol for the time period. [BACK]

Po!!!: "Po" was a word Mia taught me that became part of my vocabulary very quickly. It can be used as an adjective, a noun, a verb, and just about every other part of speech, and functions about like "bad" in meaning; can mean bad, good, cool, whatever . . . very versatile little word! And it came about before Teletubbies, thank you very much. [BACK]

Y Zogoba: Mia and her friend Molly had a little character named Mr. Chu-Head, who looked a bit like Pac-Man on crack. His job was to act irate and gnaw people's butts when they misbehaved. They decided he needed a Russian cousin, and "Y Zogoba" was born, the Americanized spelling of a Russian rough translation of "Chew Head." [BACK]

Man or Astroman?: A band that I was told to listen to by my boss, Melissa. I never really listened to them though I do own a record. [BACK]

Mulch: At All-State tryouts my friends and I met a guy who called himself "Mulch" and who could recite the multiple definitions of mulch in some obscenely short amount of time. His memory was worth preserving. [BACK]

The navel of the hairy bro: There was some guy at our school who my friends referred to as "The Hairy Bro," I didn't know him. I just knew that if the origins of something were unknown, we speculated that it came out of this guy's navel. [BACK]

She's fluffy, not fat: This began when a dog was described as "fat" when actually the dog just had a lot of fur. It was determined that said dog was "fluffy, not fat." After that, I seem to recall the word "fluffy" being used to describe one of our overweight teachers, though I'm sure I didn't think of it. [BACK]

Keel mah landlode: From an Eddie Murphy skit, I believe, where a jailbird was writing poetry. One of the lines was about killing his landlord. [BACK]

The Purity Test: Not the usual Purity Test, but the Animaniacs purity test. It gauges your exposure to Animaniacs. I was obsessed with that show. [BACK]

OK, Mez Jardan, you're one tough bitch, and your boss is a goddamn saint: A direct quote from Catspaw, one of my favorite books to this day. I had shared it with Mia recently and told her that this was one of my favorite quotes. Cat's way of speaking is amazingly hilarious at times. [BACK]

I am travelling back in time to say I WILL PUNISH YOU!: First of all, I wrote that well after that week had passed, meaning I turned back in the book and wrote it from the "future." The part about punishing is just a cheeseball quote from Sailor Moon. [BACK]

Malcolm McDowell: I believe he played Alex in A Clockwork Orange, with which my sister was obsessed and to which I had been frequently exposed. [BACK]

Strokin', strokin' the lizard: Obvious euphemism for masturbation that we found I believe in some article about Ween. [BACK]

Clean me: This was a term used in a Ween article. It is an expression of disgust. [BACK]

Porridge, Porridge Lump: Obvious play on "My name's Forrest, Forrest Gump." [BACK]

Marijuana, Marijuana, LSD, LSD: Sung to the tune of "Frere Jacques," I picked this up, probably from Mia. [BACK]

Go to BigLots for Animaniacs Jigsaw!: I had heard that a store called BigLots had an Animaniacs jigsaw puzzle. I wanted to own it because I was obsessed and wanted everything that had to do with the cartoon. [BACK]

Laundy: The coolest high school history teacher ever. He let me play They Might Be Giants in the classroom and always talked about beer. [BACK]

Masquerading as someone I'm not: I wrote this because it was the week of Halloween and I was going to dress up, as I do every year. [BACK]

Aaron is a Rita. Mia is a Skippy. I AM A DOT!!: Referring to my our scores on the Animaniacs purity test. Dot was rather high, meaning I was very obsessed. [BACK]

Look for Animaniacs raisins. And walnut soda: Animaniacs stickers were being distributed through SunKist raisins. I wanted them. I also wanted to find walnut soda because Slappy drinks it in the cartoon. [BACK]

Bug Brookee to get me stickers!: A girl in my chorus class, Brooke, worked at Discovery Zone or something and said that one of the prizes for tickets was Animaniacs stickers. I wanted some. So I bugged her. [BACK]

Have Phil's testicles removed: Phil was my boyfriend. He was always just a bit too horny for me. [BACK]

I WANNA WEEN!: Ween became a verb, meaning hang out and listen to Ween for an extended period of time. [BACK]

GIVE ME SLACK!: That's a Subgenius thing. You can't really explain Subgenius, if you really must know you can go to their site. [BACK]

Pig leg: This is from The Tick. A character had a leg that was a live pig. Weird. [BACK]

R + G: Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. Great play by Tom Stoppard. [BACK]

Should I get in the hot tub?: A quote from, I believe, an Eddie Murphy skit, in which he is imitating James Brown. We amended it to have the part about jizz, though. We like to be disgusting. [BACK]

Pasta replacements: Very humdrum actually. I worked as a pasta chef. I had to cancel work, so I needed to find someone to take my shift. [BACK]

Wiggies: Our term for toes. I don't know where it came from. But Mia frequently threatened to make "wiggie stew." [BACK]

Queen Slug-for-a-butt: An evil character on the cartoon Earthworm Jim. [BACK]

Lick the palm for guava: A Ween lyric, yet again. From the song "Licking the Palm for Guava." [BACK]

Mr. Bollock-Apple: Something from the Tank Girl comics that Mia told me about. [BACK]

Randolph-Macon: A college . . . they kept sending me literature about their college long after I'd decided where I was going to go. So I decided they should die. [BACK]

Wakkorotti: As in, the Great Wakkorotti, from Animaniacs. A skit in which Wakko gets on stage and plays a classical piece with belches. [BACK]

He's gonna shit when he finds out it's SHIT!: Quote from . . . I think, Billy Madison, starring Adam Sandler. [BACK]

"You're the faggot." A quote from The Forbidden Zone. "It's not my brother, it's my sister!" "Ehh, it's your brother, he only acts like a broad, he's a faggot." "YOU'RE the faggot!" [BACK]

Tangent: This meant something, was funny, and I can't remember why. Maybe because it meant something was touching something else, and we used it in a dirty way? [BACK]

Die screaming with sharp things in your head: The name of a movie (not a real one!) referenced on the TV show Red Dwarf. Hilarious. Can you tell it's supposed to be a horror movie? [BACK]

Fu' you!: Obviously is short for "fuck you," but it is from Catspaw by Joan D. Vinge, again. Cat says this to someone when he is drugged with some substance that messes up his speech. [BACK]

Rain Cake: We (my friends and I) made a cake after running around in the rain. We named it the Rain Cake. Yay. [BACK]

42 pairs of panties: I counted my pairs of panties and got 42. That's the answer to life, the universe, and everything. [BACK]

Plug it up: You probably don't want to hear this, but it was likely that this week I was on the rag. "Plug it up" is a term for putting in a tampon. [BACK]

JACK!: As in, Daniels. Ween likes to drink this type of alcholic beverage. [BACK]

Mistaping episodes #1, #2, #3, and #4: Of Animaniacs, of course. I set the timer wrong and messed it all up, and was very pissed at myself. [BACK]

I AM A YAKKO!!!!!: On the purity test, this time when I took it my score was so high that I was counted as a Yakko. EXTREMELY obsessive. [BACK]

Nice shoes, let's fuck. A pick-up line I heard from someone. [BACK]

The Blue God of Death!: I think this is from Project A-ko. [BACK]

MMPR: The Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers; I didn't like them. [BACK]

O SPARROW! I WANT TO MARRY YOU!: My English teacher, Mr. Fairweather, said this for some reason, mockingly. I can't remember the exact context. [BACK]

Wa-ah! (Laura): When I was really little and we were camping, some little girl was lost and she said her name was Wa-ah. It turned out she was trying to say Laura. For some reason this memory resurfaced and ended up in my planner. [BACK]

Stoning at Jack's: In some class we ended up in a discussion about how going to hangings and stonings were like parties back in the day. I imagined invitations and laughed. [BACK]

vomit: Yes, this week I was throwing up. Nervous stomach. [BACK]

I was so bored once, I fucked a dog: This didn't happen. I was making it up. [BACK]

There is no side 2: In the introduction of Arise!, a Subgenius video, it warns us that no matter what anyone says there is NO side 2 to the videotape. If we are to discover a side 2, it says, do NOT look at it. [BACK]

Stop, stop, Ween!: Something I seem to remember Gene Ween saying in a video, when he wanted the "Ween Machine" to stop playing. [BACK]

Tax thingy?: A Monty Python's Flying Circus quote. They were talking about putting a tax on sex, but didn't want to say sex. [BACK]

Cornholio: Most people know this one, but Cornholio is a character Beavis mutates into on Beavis & Butt-head when he has too much caffeine. . . . [BACK]

Dingo, hen, and fly: I have no idea. Probably something psycho Mia said in Russian or something. [BACK]

Flying to Topeka to meet Cookie: I met some girl named Cookie online, and when we each had discovered the other claimed she could fly, we arranged to meet over Topeka, Kansas, since it was equally between where we each lived. Er, but it never happened. :) [BACK]

Bruce Party: I was having a party to show my movie Bruce the Duck. [BACK]

swank swank: A very important one! Mia and I named all the styles of music that went through "Wakko's 2-note Song" from the Animaniacs album, and one was swank. I went around saying "swank swank" online when I was bored during that time, and it was from this that my online name and famous persona, SwankiVY, was formed. . . . [BACK]

When the spaceship comes, we'll all be naked: A boy named Jason at our school seemed to have Subgenius leanings. He also seemed to be mentally challenged or something, and went around saying this phrase a lot in reference to the Subgenius X-day saucers. [BACK]

Lazy Days: From the Moody Blues song. :) [BACK]

Sam and Max: Comic book characters. [BACK]

Hi, I'm TTAD . . . : In the apartment I was going to move into, the roommates used the label "TTAD"--"Touch this and die"--to label things they wanted unmolested. One time Bryan came to the door and said he was TTAD and wanted his stuff. [BACK]

DISHWATER! And put it in a DIRTY GLASS!: A quote from the comic Sam and Max . . . Max orders that when asked what he wants to drink. [BACK]

Hygnwei!: A funny name we came up with. I decided she was my daughter later. [BACK]

Eat fish, Ishmael!: Something from Animaniacs, I think. [BACK]

The little things of nature . . . they don't know that they're ugly.: From the Ren and Stimpy song "Happy Happy Joy Joy." [BACK]

FROP!: Some type of drug that Ivan Stang, the scribe from Church of the Subgenius, likes to do. [BACK]

FART ON MOM! UTTERLY JUVENILE FART/PEE HUMOR!!!: This was an advertisement for a twisted comic book put out by the Subgenius Foundation. I think it was for Pee Dog, which was stupid and disgusting. [BACK]

buttcam: This was some sort of persecution idea Mia and Molly came up with, I think, designed to follow people around and film their butts. [BACK]

Stuff to find: This was all crap that had to do with Animaniacs. [BACK]

Church Membership: to the Church of the Subgenius, of course. [BACK]

Here, Belle! Take a hit!: Can't remember what this is from for the life of me, but it sure was funny. I think the "Belle" was the one from Beauty and the Beast, though. [BACK]

We came, we saw, we kicked some choral butt: Our chant at choral festival after we won all sorts of recognitions. [BACK]

De-beak: Well, this is something you have to do to a prairie squid before you "use" it. Prairie squids are sex toys whose virtues are extolled in the Subgenius literature. You have to remove the beak. [BACK]

Fuish! Subfuish!: Phil and my sister Lindsay came up with some kind of language called Philinzish or something. "Fuish" was stomach. You can imagine what Subfuish was. [BACK]

Country album, yee-ha!: Ween came out with an album all of country songs. Scary. [BACK]

Line dancing: I taught Mia a line dance so we could make up a fake video for one of Ween's country songs. [BACK]

Jogging: Fat chance. [BACK]

SAUCER!!!: As in, Dick Saucer, from Dragon Half. Very funny character who is part superstar singer and part dragon slayer and hero. Sings his own name in a very goofy way. [BACK]

Bleeding from the mouth: I had just gotten my wisdom teeth removed. Yuck. [BACK]

I was possessed by Black Wolf. It wasn't my fault. In the movie Wizards, a character turns on the heroes and does something horrid. It turns out she was just possessed by the movie's main villain, Black Wolf. After seeing that movie together, Mia and I decided everything we did wrong was because we had been possessed by Black Wolf. [BACK]

You ever been with a squirrel and a stub?: I think that's from BioDome or some such nonsense. [BACK]

Darkness, you virgins!: At the Rocky Horror Picture Show, people who haven't been to the show in the theater before are "virgins." RHPS fans have many things they do along with the movie to make it more interesting; one is to light lighters during one song. At the part in the song where it says, "there's a light . . . in the darkness . . . " everyone who knows what's up shuts off their lighters on the word "darkness." Anyone whose lighter is still on gets screamed at. [BACK]

Spam in the place where you live: A Weird Al song. Duh. [BACK]

Dammit, Janet, I wanna screw: Warped Rocky Horror lyrics, which replace, "Dammit, Janet, I love you." [BACK]