Usually we wouldn't let Lindsay play, because she was too little. Come on, she was like FIVE YEARS younger than me! That means when I was seven she was TWO! How can a two-year-old play Rescuers? But sometimes Mom made us "let her play!!!" so we would give her some minor role. Sometimes she'd be satisfied with that and other times she'd holler and scream and freak out, but just as often she wasn't interested in whatever we were doing and was content just to be in the room. But however it happened, one of the things we liked to play was Cabbage Patch Kids.
None of us ever had a Cabbage Patch doll and none of us ever saw the movies (well, to my knowledge). I think the record was a gift, I have no idea how we got it, but it told the story of an evil woman named Lavender McDade who kidnapped two Cabbage Patch Kids to dig gold in her mine, and how the brave Otis Lee managed to save them (with the help of Colonel Casey and some very angry bees). Anyway, I liked to be in charge of the games if I could because I thought being the oldest sister afforded me an imaginary right to order people around. Usually we argued about how to play and who would be who and what songs each of us would get to sing, but for this record I ended up telling my sisters that I'd seen the Cabbage Patch movie (giant lie--I didn't even know if there WAS one), and since I'd seen it I therefore knew "how it goes" and was entitled to direct the action. I was a little stinker, huh. Moving on.
There were some really fun songs. There was a part that stumped me, though: The song where the villains sang. None of us wanted to be the villains, so no one could sing that song and we had to just sit and listen to it. That kinda sucked. And there was one song where the two kidnapped Cabbage Patch girls were singing about how they wanted to go home, and Pattie and I used to argue about which one of us should sing Ramie's part and who would sing the part of Sybil Sadie. Ramie sang nicer so we liked her better, but I think I consented to let Pattie sing her part most of the time because if I was Sybil Sadie that meant I was allowed to sing the cool "Cabbage Patch Dreams" song at the end, by myself. When this ploy was discovered Pattie invented the scenario that I was singing and bothering her while she was trying to sleep, so the song was punctuated with lots of "Be quiet! Shut UP!" Fun.
So guess what? When I was thinking about these events of my childhood, I wondered whether the songs were available anywhere anymore. Long story short: They are, and I downloaded all of them.
Listening to them was disturbing for several reasons. Number one: Goddamned if I didn't remember almost every single word. Number two: The Ramie/Sybil Sadie song, my favorite, actually isn't that good, and the particular download I got of it cut off before the end. I may have to try to find that one again. Number three: Damn is the plot stupid. I had no idea that what we acted out so many times was so freaking mindless. Number four: Did you know that the whole myth of the Cabbage Patch Kids is that they grew from magic cabbages that were sprinkled with special crystals shed from flying bunny rabbits? Holy shit. Number five: Yelling "WOOGIE!" at Cabbage Jack is still funny.
I wonder if there are any Hugga Bunch sound files lying around the 'Net?
"...And the most amazing thing about a Cabbage Patch Kid is that each one grows to be a special one!"
Notes:
hugs [~*away*~]
That's funny. My cousins and I would play " The Last Unicorn" all the time. I was always Amalthea because I was the unicorn freak of the family. Another game we used to play was to create a scenario, and then we had to write music for that scenario. It was kind of like a contest. But it was fun! Ahh the days of Kool-aid and roses. [For Your Life]
Wow that is some memory you have there. I think I remember the songs too! Weird!! Weren't they "bunny-bees"? Or was that something else...? Love---P
I want to know what crack Xavier Roberts was smoking when he came up with those names [wunderkont]
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! I never saw the movie OR heard the music, so I must be missing out. I did have a cabbage patch kid, and the funniest thing to me is the signature on their asses. What kinda perv guy would sign his name on a bunch of kids' asses? [Meggie]
The antithesis of Cabbage Patch Kids was, of course, Garbage Pail Kids. Without going into a nostalgic rant about collecting the damn things, I'll just say that I came up with that idea long before it was commercialized. I was in the fifth grade. The Challenger had blew up that year. I swear I have drawings that I made... Ok, maybe not. I might still have some old stickers though. [Optimus_prime]
I thought Cabbage Patch Dolls were *ugly* when I was young. I was a "Care Bear" girl when it cames to cuddly things but then, inevitable as it was, I was overcome by Sanrio and all things Hello Kitty. HAHAHA, lovely story though :) Thanks for sharing - and I mean that! [katqueen]