The other day my co-worker Mario and I were hanging out in the back room and we came across some magazine with naked chicks doing sexy things in it. He kind of flipped through it and just shook his head and made a face. When he saw me watching him, he said something like, "I just don't like vaginas. How can anyone find that attractive?"
I told him I agreed with him on that point, though I can't say I feel any differently about penises. I "came out" to him about my sexual orientation since he seemed a bit puzzled, and said it wasn't actually so much that I have no sexual orientation as that my sexual orientation seems to be "no." He was like, "Oh, well one of my best friends is asexual." Heh.
He went on to mention again that vaginas gross him out, and then we went about our work.
At some other point I said something that ended with "But that was about ten years ago," at which point he gave me an odd look and asked me, "How old are you?" I told him.
Yeah, I thought he was going to have a shit fit. "You're twenty-five??" He, incidentally, is nineteen. I called him a little boy. It was amusing.
By the way, I think he was kinda testing the waters at our store for a while, trying to figure out if it was okay to be open about his being gay. He would mention his boyfriend and call him "my friend" or "my roommate." Eventually he figured out that we all think he's awesome and his desire to pound guys in the ass makes us feel neither more or less accepting of him. We rule.
Too bad he's leaving. He got an assistant managership at Claire's Boutique.
Oh, and we had an interesting conversation at one point about how he thinks every gay person goes through a phase where they're vegetarian and into New Age. I thought about it but I don't think I currently know any gay people who are an exception, well except for the fact that for some of them it is not a "phase."
Today I hate Weird Al. See, the worst thing about Weird Al is that when he parodies a shitty song, you end up humming that song and then everyone thinks you like Backstreet Boys.
But man, I'm obsessed with that song. "Found it on eBay. . . . "
For months our higher-ups have assured us that when we got the Harry Potter book we could read it as long as it didn't leave the back room. Then the boxes got here today and they went and changed their minds on us! My co-worker Cliff and I had brought our pillows and both lunch and dinner so we could sit in the back room and read it after our shifts until they kicked us out! And we didn't get to! WAH! We're not even supposed to open the boxes!
We're still working on our managers to see if they'll let us read it, but I think I'm gonna have to wait like everyone else. Goddamn it! I was all looking forward to taunting everyone!!!
I did get to molest the boxes, though.
When they got piled up under the desk I got down on my knees and started hugging them--I found out later Cliff did that too, and so did our café manager Ariel--and after my shift was over I went and crawled under the counter so I could lay on top of 240 copies of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. It was fun. (And it's a tiny space under there, so no one else could really fit to do that.) Hehe! And I found a weird clear spider under the receiving counter.
By the way, if you didn't already know, my short story "Bad Fairy" is being expanded to a novel. So far the prologue and four chapters have been done. Exciting.
Also taking up all my time. :P
Here I go again.
Notes:
"Eventually he figured out that we all think he's awesome and his desire to pound guys in the ass makes us feel neither more or less accepting of him. We rule." -- This made me laugh so hard. Therefore, you rule even more. [PinkBoi]
That random note from the azn whyte girl was really funny beacuse I was thinking about you and how much I would love to spank your ass with a dildo. And I am sooooooo jealous. You are sooooo close to them.... sigh. [Meggie]
shit all that sex was a lie you bitch
"I get to molest the boxes"...... Man last time I did that I got in trouble for it. I love boxes just as much as the next guy.... but why molest when a nice caressing can be just as satisfying.
Mama Mia here we go again.
My my, how can I resist you?
Sexy boxes, molestation never ends.
Yeah yeah, humping like a rhino.
I was born to be a star. And listen o the Mama Mia! soundtrack a bijillion times.
I think most of my school population is homophobic, honestly. They think I'm a freak because I'm openly accepting of homosexuals. Humph. [katqueen]