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Pointy Ears


Okay, so, I got this wild hair that I would dress like an elf at work the last ten days or so before Christmas.  It was mostly out of a mix between extreme boredom and the certainty that I could get away with it--no one at work was likely to yell at me for being silly since I have some serious seniority, plus I've been called an elf before WITHOUT dressing up, and so I would make a good one and pull it off well.  So, I got out my old green hat with the bell on it and my jingle-bell necklace, slipped on some red and green clothes, and got a hold of a pair of costume ears.  Cute effect, really.

As a result, I've gotten some of the WORLD'S STRANGEST COMMENTS.  Some of you may know that the star of my book series, Ivy, happens to have pointed ears (not just around Christmas, either), and sure she gets her share of comments, but I'm thinking maybe I need to revise a little, based on my experience wearing my pretend ears (which turned into interesting research).  More people notice and comment than I'd thought possible, and they say stuff I would never have imagined.  I realize that there are some differences between my situation and Ivy's, of course, and that might account for my different experience.  Lots of the people who are commenting already know me and know my ears aren't real, for one thing, and besides that even though they are fairly realistic it is still not tough to tell they're fake.  Secondly I'm wearing elf clothes, so people assume it's to go with my costume (though I've worn plain clothes around with the costume ears being the only remnant of my elf costume and people still say stuff).  Plus it's around Christmas time so people are in that frame of mind.  All that aside, here are some fun things I've experienced this week. . . .

Of course first and foremost people make comments about me being one of Santa's helpers, or asking me if I'm helping Santa this year.  Expected, even when I'm not wearing any jingle-bells or silly hats.  Then there are the people who ask me if those are my real ears.  Those people are weird.  One time someone at work asked me that and the guy working next to me told him, "Yeah, those are her real ears!"  Heh.  One woman using the phone said, "Your ears aren't really that pointy are they?"  I didn't exactly answer; I just said, "What do you think?" and took off my hat (because people seem to think that the ears are attached to the hat sometimes).  She just looked at me and said, "I'm not sayin' a word."  Uh-huh.

One lady at the post office asked me if I speak Elfish.  Uh-huh.  I have gotten several comments about Vulcans.  I hadn't thought of that; that was never mentioned in the Ivy books (which is good because she wouldn't have known what the hell they were talking about, seeing as how she has never seen Star Trek--plus she wouldn't be able to return their greeting sign).  I guess you wouldn't be able to get through eighteen years of interacting with people having pointed ears and not be kidded about being from planet Vulcan.  

Randomly, people say, "I like your ears."  Thanks?  Me too?  Someone told me I look like Kira from The Dark Crystal.  (Strangely enough I've been told that WITHOUT the ears too.)  One of my co-workers just came up and pinched my ears; another one of my co-workers poked one of them and said, "Wow, they're soft."  Yeah, they're kind of made out of latex or something, right?  (Man, I'm trying to imagine Ivy's reaction if someone tried to pinch her ear.  Bad idea!  She'd be offended on sooo many levels.)

Then there are the people who say very odd things, like giving me a disgusted look and saying, "What happened to your ears?"  What do you mean what happened to them?  What a strange question.  One guy I rang up at the register gave me a strange look and said, "You have funny-looking ears."  Oh really?  News to me.  I put my hat over them when he said that, and said, "You don't have to look at them."  He kind of laughed and then we went on with the transaction.  It disturbed me.

Almost everyone notices, and about half of them say something.  So far this has been a rather eye-opening experience, and . . . hehehe, fun.  I'll have to remember this couple weeks when writing about Ivy in the future.  Yay for having an excuse to do this bizarre kind of research!  Why didn't I do it seven years ago?

That's all for now.  Ho-ho-ho! 


I love the irony in you dressing up as an elf in light of certain *ahem* drama that have occurred on certain sites. :) Not that one has anything to do with the other, but I love it anyway! - Ronni

I'd have expected Legolas fangirl comments, too. :) [Meggie]

hey elf girl happy day that has all kinds of meaning .but is diffent to everyone bye bye [bale]

*tugs on ears*

Cute! [katqueen]

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