Inheritance Cycle Essay Comments 141 through 150

Ireny: "That was a wonderful review," expostulated the girl enthusiastically. She was seated in front of a computer, which was the hue of darkest night. Next to her was a desk, with many cluttered tomes and codexes scattered in an indiscriminate fashion. A small bowl of ramen was placed in an artistically pleasing fashion next to the testaments, where it gradually lost calefaction.
None of these items will ever be mentioned again.
"There wasn't a single point I didn't agree with," recommenced the girl. "The author, whoever she is, should be given an award of some sort. Probably a big shiny one that she can hang on her wall, for Services Rendered to High Literature or something equally noble. Also, you used 'expostulate' incorrectly."
"Expostulate. It means 'to express opposition, often by argument,' and I wasn't arguing with anything," elucidated the girl in a misanthropic tone of voice.
But it was in the thesaurus next to 'said'!
"But it doesn't mean the same thing," expostulated the girl, rolling her eyes irritatedly. "Here - you used 'expostulate' twice in the same comment. Isn't there some kind of law against that?"
Don't blame me! I'm only sixteen!!11 Omg u suk liek so much!111 im leavign now!!1
"Glad to hear it."
"Well, good riddance."

Angela: I kind of randomly came across the page where you responded to people's emails about Eragon. I just thought it was amusing that people use such bad grammar when responding to a very articulate essay. I haven't read the book, and after reading your criticism, I feel no need to.

Ana: Perfect essay, just loved it. I openly admit I haven't read either installments of the Inheritance series, and I've been skeptical with the movie hype. A couple of years ago I would see a stray classmate or two with their nose shoved into a copy, but didn't think of it further until one day when the tv was on in the background, I thought a movie trailer announcer was going on about Aragorn. While it obviously wasn't a spinoff like the future Wolverine film is to the X-Men series, my mind immediately thought, 'Cool. New fantasy movie.' - until I got the scoop. The synopsis, names and even visuals drew up mental red flags. The media's painting it to be the great new fantasy, complete with obligatory video game. Paolini took Middle Earth, combined it with some coming-of-age fantasies (and with Arya's 'perfection', I'm willing to bet a few questionable ones), played with some Scrabble chips for twenty minutes to vomit random tacky names, and said, "Mommeeeee! Can we chuck this at gullible schoolchildren while I wear a cheap Renaissance monkey suit, pleeeeeease?"

I'm sticking to the line that seems to be staple with this series: done before, and done better.

David E: Hi, i have similar feeling about Eragon to yourself. At the moment i'm doing a bit of research into how it got published at all.

You mention at the end of the essay that it was published via a "vanity press" (i.e. his parent's publishing company) - i just wanted some clarification; do you mean the publishing of Eragon alone resembled a vanity publication, or did you mean that his parents publishing company itself is actually a vanity press in the sense that they are known to publish at the authors expense, or that they're an unrecognised company that tends to re-sell the unsold stock back to the author, or engage in similar practises?

Erinne (Pronouced: ERIN): Hello,
I must say that this is a fascinating site, however I did recently read one almost identical but I didn't look up the publication date so don't know who was the original author. However that doesn't really matter, and this sounds slightly more original so anyway...
Eragon. I bought the book. I read the book. I finished the book, and that is all it's going to be, another space filler on my shelf. Unfortunately I bought Eldrest the same day.
Oh, why didn't he do the proper thing with all stoys? (tear the entire thing down the the bones, build it better, hand it to an editor, then do the process again. Around 5-6 times would have done it) It may have been good.
The copied names! I love Aragon (however I'm not sure I spelt it right. whoops) and this... bloke... calls his book Eragon, has birdy wraiths (in black cloaks?!), 13 forsaken (kings of men?), afore mentioned (by the essay writer, not me) sexy elves, redneck dwarves(who wants pretty dwarves?), and an ancient dwarf city in the middle of a mountain(... idiot.) Has anyone gone up to this 'man/author/thingy' smacked their head and gone DUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

i would like to point out that the map at the front is VERY similar to the map in Robert Jordans' "The Wheel of Time".


swankivy: Note: Yes, the essay is by me, entirely, 100%, and not quoted or stolen or paraphrased from anyone else's words anywhere. If you see it somewhere else, tell me so I can smack them for stealing my work. (I have found my Eragon essay being SOLD on a book report site before, guys!)

Dot:[quote]Oh, don't worry, you're right on that. It's also true that "the average reader" doesn't know his ass from his elbow.[/quote]

*feels a terrible amount of hurt*

[quote]I realize this was written for the lowest common denominator--a lot of its fans are teens and below (not to insult the young, but ya know, they tend to have less learning and experience under their belts and therefore weaker discriminatory powers)[/quote]

*is even more hurt*

[quote]and a lot of its fans do not have the literary patience to read stuff like Tolkien or Jordan or whatever--so of course this stuff seems kinda new to them[/quote]

*dies an agonisingly slow death*
Oh the pain, the pain of it all (heh¡­don¡¯t you just love clich¨¦s?)

[quote]it seems fresh and amazing and inventive when actually the people who really invented it did it a lot better. It's not that the concepts aren't in some ways cool. It's just that they were already cool before he wrote them, when they were invented or constructed from myth in someone else's work.[/quote]

*comes back to life* well¡­you¡¯ve redeemed yourself a little with this comment, but please on behalf of the fantasy book geeky teen¡¯s generation¡­be nice 

Other than that though I'm going to have to agree with most of what you've said on Eragon.

BattleHamster: I just feel obliged to put a positive comment here because I owe Christopher Paolini. If it wasn't for his books I might not have done as well on my finals. I'd want to take a break from studying so I'd start reading Eragon. Then just like that I'd immediately get the urge to go back to studying.

Ashleigh: Good essay! Some great points covered, with good humour.

Pacoflyer: I dont mind that it is taken from others, I like this type of story. I liked Star Wars, this is like Star Wars so I like this, I also Like Fantasy more.

The story was good was told in a readable way no huge words that i have to go look up. I like the start from nothing become superhero story.

This story has been set since ancient greeks.

If it didnt say "star wars, light sabre, the ring," Then I don't care. It was a good story was written more than well enough.

If you didn't like it your not the target audience.

Thats like if you work for Porsche, you go and grill a ford focus for having a seat a steering wheel, a clutch, windows.

Its not saying Porsche on it so it not a porshe its a ford focus.

BUT milloins of people drive ford foucuses. They are not Porsches target auidence if they drive a ford focus.

[My response? HERE!]

Emery Watkins: I'd have to say, you were right on the ball with all of the technical issues of Eragon. I tried reading the book just a couple of days ago and absolutely couldn't get through it. It had no feeling, no originality, not even a hint of artistic maturity. The characters were all essentially Chris Paolini or Chris Paolini with a slighty different attitude about murder. The towns and countryside, while lavishly decorated with a number of words, had no real substance, no interesting features that stuck out. It felt to me like it was written by a kid who did a little reading about HOW to write a novel, but didn't actually realize that novel-writing is an artform and requires a great deal of thought and care to pull off well. Forgive me if you said this, as it's been over a week since I read your essay, but probably if Paolini would have sent it to a real editor or agent (which is to say, NOT his parents or his parents' best friends), it either would have been utterly rejected or would have been considered on the condition that the author do several years' worth of heavy editing. As it is, it's essentially a copy-edited rough-draft, and no one with even a little sophistication wants to read that.
So thank you for your essay! It saddens me that crap like Eragon can make so much damn money. Where are our standards, people?

Alex: I know this is like the 39604 milionth comment u get seeing how u have so many essays listed but after reading ur review of Eldest i really feel like writing a comment of my own.First of all i really appreciate the way ur toungue-in-cheeck style pointed out the flaws of CP's works.I mean u could very well have used the same high-and-mighty vocabulary he resorted to just to combat the obvious and the fact that u didnt and kept things simple and fun really made the difference.Second,the fact that u pointed out singular errors as well as keeping in mind the bigger picture of it all is a testimony to the profesionalism of ur work way to go dude ;).Third and last(this isnt really a point but rather a request),i also tried my hand at writing for a bit and found out that i was basicly spewing out bits and pieces of the fantasy worlds i was familiar with(LOTR,Warcraft etc).Could u give me a few pointers,some do's and dont's?I would really appreciate it.
To sum up,I just want to say i greatly appreciated ur essays and i hope to hear from u soon.

Lala: I have to agree with your article on Eragon/Eldest! I read the book after hearing so much about its awful writing from a friend. In fact, she said it was so bad she decided to give up writing until she graduates college (this is a girl whose been writing as long as Paolini, if not longer). I haven't gone that far, but it does make me more determined to actually... oh, I dunno... take my time to edit my work before its published? I'd rather publish a great novel when I'm older than a crappy novel when I'm young!
And yes, I did find the plotline very overdone... and I also found that the characters seemed to speak somewhat the same. Maybe they are made of cardboard!

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