Instant Witch Syndrome

How many times have I gotten variants of this same letter from the same girl and her soul sisters:

HI umm ur page is kewl umm can u tell me how 2 B a REAL WITCH b/c i want to cast spellz for my teachr to pass me and the guy I like to like me 2!!!! can u help me? im a natural witch i think and 2day i bougt a PENTAGRAM NEKLACE kewl HUH???? um ok tell me how but how can i make sure my mom doesnt kno OK??? blessed be (is that what u say to b a witch? write bak soon!!! ps can u do that stuff like in that movie THE CRAFT??? ok ttyl!!!

Heh, this is making me giggle (and driving me halfway to vomit) just writing this. I don't mean to mock people (okay maybe I do) but I'm not sure I can take this kind of shit too much longer.

Instant Witch Syndrome is, of course, not limited to young girls or women, but instead can affect any impressionable soul, usually one who has lots of unfulfilled desires and thinks they can be taken care of with chanting, spices, and lit candles bearing mysterious engraved symbols. Their main problem is that they go into "Crafting" trying to get something out of it. The best reason to go into it, in my humble opinion, is that the concepts that you've heard about intrigue you. When you just want to jump into it because you want love and money, you might as well hire a matchmaker to get you a mate, and a good stockbroker to get you some cash, 'cause the latter option is a lot more likely to work with that attitude.

My advice: Don't get into Wicca, Witchcraft, Druidism, or whatever other aspect of the Pagan world beckons you just because you want something. If you do it, do it because you're interested, because something about it calls to you, because you sincerely think it's the right path. DON'T get into it because your best friend is doing it. DON'T get into it because you want to hex your enemy or turn your ex-boyfriend into a toad. DON'T get into it because you want to be part of the New Age scene. Do it because it seems right. And come to think of it, take that advice for any new chapter you start writing in your book of life. (Eww, gross, I need to shut up, I'm waxing poetic.)

As a final word for anyone interested who doesn't want to be considered a wannabe Witch, I'd suggest doing two things: TALK to PEOPLE and READ some BOOKS. Talk to people about what books to read and talk to people about whether what's in the books is full of crap or if it's good advice. Turn it over in your own mind and integrate it. Find a teacher if it works best for you that way. But don't let any one author or acquaintance tell you there's only one way or that the best way for you HAS to be what turned out to be the best way for them. (If you want that attitude, there're plenty of good ol' patriarchal religions to join that won't get you persecuted.) Write it all down, assimilate it, think about it, and act on it. But don't watch movies like The Craft or TV shows like Sabrina (haha) and decide you have a working knowledge of what Witches do. If you've already watched these things and do currently harbor that delusion, and want to "get into" Witchcraft because of it . . . well, let's say you're about to be really, really disappointed.

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Comments from others:

Mikey: Ah yes the instant witch syndrome I think one of my favorites are well I need to get back at someone, or I watched charmed for three seasons and am ready to begin where's the wand?
Well for all those who choose the path of stupidity from watching a movie or a TV show wake up this is not something that comes in passing this needs to be an understanding a way of life a balance of mind body and soul, and for well the moron with the want for vengeance think twice, that is not what it is about not even close and those who choose to take the path of ignorance be prepared for the pain.

Marintha: Oh they drive me up a wall and out a window. :facepalm: The 'love spell' wanters are the ones I just want to beat over the head with a shoe. A) No. Just... no. B) If the boy doesn't want you, WHY would you want him, he's not worth making every pagan within 50 miles wake up screaming at your stupidity.

I'll just never understand. It's NOT some quick-fix to everything. It's a way of life and a religion. Or else I would be queen of Indiana and surrounded by scantily clad anime-resembling boys. :Whistles innocently:

I'm not much of an active pagan, meaning I don't really study into spells. I have seasonal ceremonies of course, but what person attempting druidism wouldn't? And I've never met an actual pagan face to face so I may be way in over my head trying to talk about this. But... uuurrgghh. X.x

Horticultural1: I wonder why they're singling you out as the person to introduce them to the mysteries of Wicca, Druidism, et al. That seems sort of irresponsible -- isn't changing religions something you want to talk to with someone you know in person, face-to-face? If it's really that important to them, they would probably put more effort into learning about in the first place.

I agree with you and the poster who said that it's often just some sort of fad or phase. Some of them think that it's like Sabrina and you can use it to destroy your enemies (except it doesn't even work that way on THAT show -- every episode, Sabrina tries to use magic to improve her life and it backfires, which sends the message ironically that witchcraft is a BAD thing).