Asking for a Picture


I don't mind sharing my pictures; I mean, there're like a billion of them up on my website, right? Why do I get so uptight about this subject, you ask? BECAUSE MY PICTURE IS FREQUENTLY REQUESTED BEFORE MY NAME! What kind of crap is that??

I've heard all kinds of excuses for why it is not dippy to ask me to send my picture immediately upon meeting me. A lot of people insist they believe it's somehow about honesty, or explain condescendingly that they DESERVE to see the person they're talking to and they're entitled to ask anyone they please. And yet somehow they act like they're offended if I suggest that their real motivation is "to see if you're good-looking enough to waste my time hitting on you." Sure, not everyone who wants my picture would necessarily stop talking to me if I turned out to be ugly. But I still think they shouldn't be asking for my picture first thing . . . or even in the first five minutes. It's acceptable if I mention something related to my appearance, like that I am really short or have very long hair, and they just want to see. It is different when they come out of nowhere going "hey, u got a pic 2 trade???" Here are statements I've been given by guys who've asked for my picture regarding why they want to see me.

So, in short, I'm tired of people obsessing over the sense of sight and considering knowing what I look like a necessary part of getting to know me. Sure it would come up eventually but "eventually" is not the first five minutes of knowing me. Leave me alone.

Any comments left here are PUBLIC. If you are not comfortable with that, mail me directly.

Email address:

Comments from others:

Mikey: Looks are not important it is what is inside that is important, but it seems that our sex drenched culture hasn't seen fit to find that to understanding as of yet so unfortunate.

D: Now I took a minute to look, and I see why your friends call you Pixie ^_^. But anyway. Not the point here.

The point is, I have gone YEARS chatting with people before ever seeing a picture of them. And you know what? I don't care! I love people's personalities. I love talking to them, and listening to what they have to say. So seeing what they look like isn't important. I have solid friendships (and have had relationships) with people that many people don't consider good looking. And I don't understand what looks have to do with friendship. Am I supposed to have pretty friends or I'm not a good person? Or if I dont' have pretty friends I'm just a bleeding heart. T_T Yes, I have gotten that before. I think it hurt me more than it hurt my friend...

Nyasu: Damn. Seeing all these rants about the idiots you come in contact with on the internet is startting to make me doubt the collective intelligence of humanity yet again (not that I wasn't misanthropic enough as it is ;)

I must ask do you find yourself contacted by morons of that sort? As it's never happened to me, I really don't get how it happens in the first place. But then...pretty much my only online interaction is message boards of a certain topic where perverts are *very* unlikely to flock. I even remember one time a guy made a thread complaining that his girlfriend wasn't putting out for him enough, and immediately all the guys on the forum started whailing on him. =D

Oh well, in the immortal words of Foamy: "May your days be bright and your contact with stupidity limited."


PS: Chatspeak is idioic. I can understand the occasional "wtf" "zomg" and "lol" but seriously... o__O;

Austin: I actually like to chat with someone for a while before, if ever, I do see their picture, because you get to know them and not what their physical image would make you think they are. If everyone met someone first and saw them later, people would no more about their friends and enemies.