Pimpy the Stud-Mouse for Sophomore Class President!
A six-foot sexless mouse who wore nothing but a pair of briefs, he was an enigma. Everyone loved him. Well, we did. Me and my friend Amy. And when class elections came around again, everyone began campaigning for their favorite cheerleaders and athletes for president. The student body gladly became billboards for advertising any and all candidates. I supported . . . who else? Pimpy.
Pimpy's election posters were all over the school. Of course, since they were not notarized by the all-knowing dean, they were promptly torn down overnight, but more replaced them. We were relentless. We stuffed lockers, wore stickers, and papered the hallways. Pimpy had to be president!
Our ballots were not constructed to accommodate write-in votes, unfortunately. I didn't vote, dammit. I only cared about Pimpy, and due to people's prejudice against rodents in student government, he wasn't even nominated. :( The next two years he ran again, but was never elected. But he lives on. One day he may be president. You watch out if you voted against him.